Knock Knock. Who's there? Mad Skills!

One of the questions I'm asked most often is when are the Rapscallions (my two man organic culinary rap group) going to drop a new album. It's certainly taken a lot longer than I would've liked. I don't want to get into all the details. Suffice it to say there was a domino effect that began with a regrettable romantic interlude with Patrick and Gina Neely that eventually led to the incarceration of our major financial backer (Lindsay Lohan).

All of that is out of the way now though. The Rapscallions featuring MC Gay Sails and DJ Beats Off is set to release our newest album, Masturbatronics. It's been hailed by some as the best music album to come out since Edison first produced the gramophone. I don't want to say too much right now, but I know that our fans have been clamoring for news. So with out further ado here is the track listing:

1. A Game of Inches

2. Lubrication

3. There's A Neely In My Pants

4. FIFA

5. Rocket Ship To Atlantis

6. Hello Tissue

7. NoTex HoPlex

8. It's Called a Breath Mint (The Pat Neely Song)

9. Gangsta Biznitch (ft. Lindsay Lohan)

10. Locally Grown

11. Sensual Internet Lover

12. Silky Hands

13. Always Finish First

14. The Door's Locked For A Reason

15. Don't Come In! I'm Busy Right Now.

Plus a secret special bonus track.

And the World Keeps on Turning

Hello Blog World! Long time no hear. I am finally returning from my long blog-sabbatical. Since my last Blog post lots has happened. I've semi-moved to Kentucky for work. I've upped my fitness regime to include kegels. I've increase my knowledge of the culinary arts such that I have earned the worlds highest honors for my daring work with meatballs.

It's tough being away from the family. I miss them a lot, but when ever I get down I think of the beautiful old Clarence Carter blues ballad and things don't seem so bad. I think we can all find our place in the universe by meditating on the lyrics to Strokin'. When you can truly understand what the words mean you have attained enlightenment.

I find that I can also combat the feeling of missing the fam, by keeping busy. I've joined an indoor soccer team, I put in extra time at work, and I've begun my quest to attain greater knowledge by reading every book of scholarly value in the world. "How do you determine such a thing?" you might ask. Well I am following in the footsteps of the great German philosopher Friedrich Nietzche who once said, "Everything I needed to know I learned in kindergarten". Following that philosophy I am working my way through every easy reader in the children's section of the Hardin County library. I am making awesome time and believe that I have astounded the librarians with the great pace in which I am devouring this knowledge. I don't know if there is an official Kentucky state record for number of books read in a lifetime, but I am sure that I have already eclipsed it in the short time I've been here.

What's going on with you world?

Some Updates

Hi everyone!! I've got lots to say, but am way too tired to probably talk about everything as much as I should. First of all let me talk about work. A few months ago I found out that my job was being eliminated. I wasn't given a definite time frame, but it was going to happen and I needed to find a new job. Well, the good news is that I've outlived my job and been offered a new position with another company. I'm excited about it and it could be a really good opportunity, but it will take me away from home a lot for the next six months and ultimately will most likely mean relocating after that six month time frame. So where as I'm excited, I'm also quite worried about being away from my family for such an extended period of time. They'll probably handle it a lot better than I will. I'm the one that cries at movies.

The boy has finished his first year of high school and enjoyed most of it. He's decided not to pursue band and is hoping that he can get a job this summer. I think he's probably younger than most places will consider, so I'm going to try to help him get a volunteer job to use as a spring board for a paying one later on. Plus it's a nice thing to do.

The girl is still playing soccer and just finished a soccer camp which was led by Mia Hamm, Kristine Lilly, and other women's soccer legends. She was really excited and got their autographs and pictures with them too. The stuff is already on her wall!

I'll write more later, but like I said........pooped.

That Time of Year

So it's that time of the year again when the world asks "What does Dagromm want for Christmas?". So in the spirit of saving time from responding to hundreds/thousands of e-mails I decided to post my list.

1. Mix Tape - Preferably a CD actually. Now don't ask what I want on it, because then I'll be making it. Put songs you like on it, or ones you think I should like. Make a best 2010 CD's or your favorite songs ever. Give it a theme like songs that include the words "cherry cola" somewhere in the lyrics or are about posteriors or something, both of which I think wouldn't be that tough to do. The best part is even if I get the same thing from everyone they would all be different.
2. Soccer Jersey - Preferably of a professional or national team, but barring that if you send me an adult sized version of your kids jersey I'll wear it too. Heck go online and design your own and make it weird as hell, I'll wear it. Just nothing that I can't wear around kids. I've got enough of that stuff in my closet already.
3. Fancy Cheese - I don't think this requires explanation. It's cheese!
4. Footwear in either purple or green (not both). I wear a 10.5 in mens. I'd prefer mens shoes.
5. Any book by an athlete you can't believe would ever write a book or have one published.

I hope this helps.

Love,
Dagromm

What's Dagromm Been Up To?

I know that's the question that has been on everyone's mind. He hasn't been blogging, is he ok? Dags has been so quiet, does that mean he's under cover saving the world from threats too horrifying to believe. I haven't heard from Mr. Dagromm, undoubtedly he has been waylayed by nefarious sultry vixens with otherworldly powers. Well loyal blog universe I can unequivocally tell you that the answer to all of these speculations is yes, yes, and yes.

Work
Outside of that I've been busy with a multitude of other things as well. Work has been busy as we are hiring about a hundred people a month right now which makes for a very busy work week. They're not high paying positions though so it seems like we're running up the down escalator a bit.

Books
I recently have been reading books by A. Lee Martinez, an author from Terrell, TX (Represent!). This means that he probably knows Jamie Foxx and my mom as Terrell is a small town and these are the only two people of note that I can think of that have lived there. His books are light affair but I found them very entertaining and would recommend. I started with Gil's All Fright Diner, which is a bit of horrorish stuff and then read In the Company of Ogres which is a fantasy novel. Both the copies I got of these books from the library had the additional bit of coolness of having been autographed by the author.

Soccer
Countless hours of coaching one team (3rd place currently) and managing another (2nd place currently) took a slight break this last week as my daughter and I did our annual trips to the Dallas Cup to watch more soccer. This year had some very entertaining games and included us getting to watch the U-20 US National Team as well as that of Mexico. Ultimately it was won by a Brazillian club (Cruzeiro) over a Mexican club (Monterrey). The final game was a thriller and ended with an onfield brawl during stoppage time. Mexican teams don't like losing and tempers tend to flare. Security was able to break everything up after a few minutes but it was insane for a little while.

Sultry Vixens
I found out a few weeks ago that I have a secret crush here at work. The mysterious lady sent reconnaissance to inquire my marital status and let me know that she was interested. I know what you're thinking, same old same old for Dags. Needless to say I've demanded an escort to my car after work each day since to ensure my safety from my stalker.

A Confession

I've wanted to talk about this for a while, but haven't had the strength to admit it. I've become a frequenter of a certain website that I need to stay away from. It's no good for me. I have doubts whether anyone should frequent it, but I can't stop. The website has pictures of things you wouldn't believe. Pictures of things that no one would ever think to take pictures of. The website in question is that of Lone Star Auctions. This is the website used by local police stations, school districts, and other government agencies to dispense of confiscated or surplus property. I'm continuously drawn there to see what new thing I can find. A lot of 30 broken school desks? A lot of 8 miscellaneous cell phones dating back 10 years? A dump truck? I've seen all of them for sale and more. Pallets of cafeteria trays, sound mixing equipment, stuffed deer heads. The merchandise varies from the mundane to the truly bizarre. For example...

Look closely. Yes indeed. That is a Cleveland Steamer. For sale!!! Who would have ever thought you could buy a Cleveland Steamer on the internet. I'm disgusted. And compelled.

Another Great Sports Interview

I don't know how many of you have already heard this, but this is a news story containing a portion of the press conference of Texas Tech head coach Mike Leach after his team lost to Texas A&M. This is the first time I've ever heard a coach blame this for his team losing.