Friday, January 19, 2007

The True and Factudinal History of the Bloggy Four

There have been some recent blog posts giving renditions of how myself, Gyuss, Cyber D, and Q became the pre-eminent force of nature that we've become. This is my attempt to clear any misinformation that may be floating around out there and give the world it's definitive answer.

It all began on a warm autumn day some fifteen years ago. I was an athletic, ambitious, smart freshman student in a small private college in north Texas. I would appear to have it all to most people, and I did, but I knew that my having it all wasn't enough. I knew that I needed to give back to the community. It was at this point that I decided to take an ignorant and unworldly west Texas freshman named Gyuss Baltaar under my wing. My interaction with Gyuss at that point had mainly been through my roommate at the time who was working with him as part of some religious mission. Gyuss was having trouble relating to the non-west Texas world around him. He wasn't well liked and in fact was struggling in many areas. Finally, Gyuss couldn't take it anymore and felt that he might need to end it all. I remember looking into that tear stained face of his and saying, "Don't you worry little bird. I'm going to help you. We're going to pull your head out of the sand and by God I swear one day you'll fly!" I saw the potential in young Gyuss. I knew that he could blossom if he was just given the right direction and had someone to believe in him. Thanks to community showers in the dorms I also knew that he was hung like no other man or beast. I mean, take your breath away, it gave me nightmares.
It seemed that much of Gyuss' stress revolved around his roommate CyberD. Now I had met CyberD a few times and we really hadn't spoken a lot, but I knew for my plan to work and for Gyuss to live I had to have him on my side. So I took it upon myself to seek out CyberD and ensnare him in a project that seemingly had no relation what so ever with Gyuss. I knew from my conversations with Gyuss that CyberD was a fan of a game that I happened to be an expert at. So CyberD and I made an appointment to meet in the school library one evening and discuss our mutual interest. By the end of the meeting, CyberD was so impressed with my skill and knowledge that he begged me to enter into a project with him and teach him. My plan was working. I told CyberD that I would allow him to work with me and be my apprentice, but that we would have to assemble a team and that Gyuss should be included. He reluctantly agreed and we embarked in a two year endeavor that would forever altar the lives of our team. During this time I came to learn a lot about CyberD and although we often were frustrated with each other, we always realized that in the end he needed me, almost as much as Gyuss. On top of that CyberD was a maestro with the ladies and Lord knows I love the ladies.

Years passed, we all graduated though CyberD tried to get us kicked out on an Environmental Economics project we worked on together. CyberD moved off to the other side of the world and Gyuss and I stayed behind to look after our little town. Gyuss became a regular at my house and in his time of need when he had to go to the hospital, I was there for him (CyberD was no where to be seen). Eventually my musky scent was too much for CyberD to live without and he moved back to our college town. At the same time Gyuss was about ready to spread his wings and finally leave the nest. It was with a heavy heart that I told Gyuss that "he was all growns up" and let him go.

Over the next couple of years I met a young whelp named Q. At first we met I was impressed with how savvy he was for such a young age and I told him that he would probably get a lot out of hanging out with my crew. He tried to set some things up a few times, but I don't allow anyone in too easily and I told Q to "go home and come back tomorrow". Eventually the Q had no recourse but to stalk me at my work and I realized that he was ready to be imparted with the lessons life had taught me. Q was an eager student and returned daily to learn more. He referred to me as "the professor" and I tried not to refer to him. I finally convinced CyberD that this apprentice of mine was ready to join our ranks as an equal (to CyberD). CyberD agreed and we began to work as a new team. Q came to depend on us and in his time of need when he had to go to the hospital, I was there for him (CyberD was no where to be seen).

Then in the last year CyberD told me that he had begun a blog and that I should check it out. I did and was so impressed that he could function without me that I quickly established my own blog and Q did the same. CyberD passed word on to Gyuss some time later and we were reconnected in the eyes of God and the general blog community.

After that it was merely a matter of time before we ruled with our army of nano-ninjas.