Thursday, December 28, 2006

All Aboard Dagromm's Freedom Bus!!
Always on the lookout for new ways to inspire the troops in their riteous quest to exterminate evil (The Corner of the Q & The Cave of Gyuss) from the world the forces of good have unveiled their newest weapon, the Freedom Bus. The Freedom Bus was masterfully designed and crafted by the sharpest mechanical minds of West Virginia. It has the ability to accerate from 0-60 in 4.2 seconds, can demolish a 93 Crown Victoria, and has a leather interior. Already a tour with Big Foot is planned with stops in Charlotte, N.C.; Darlington, S.C.; Martinsville, VA; and Mobile AL. All who want to promote a better way of life and fend off the moral decay are welcome to take a ride on the Freedom Bus!
Assassination Attempt Foiled!!!

This afternoon an assassination attempt was foiled when the forces of QGy sent a not so subtle Tara Reid bomb into the House of Dagromm trying to end the world's bid for freedom. The ruse was quickly uncovered (as is the real Tara Reid) and was subdued with copious amounts of cocaine and alcohol.
Photo of the poorly thought out Tara Reid bomb
Irresponsible Leaders Upset Their Armed Forces

The military of Gyuss and the Q have let it be know thatr they are upset with the way their leadership is approaching the war. Allegations range from misuse of military resources to an apathetic approach for the people that are putting their lives on the line everyday for some misbegotten cause. A few examples of the problems that are surfacing are:

Using miltary jets for local advertising to scrounge up more gambling money for the evil dictators:

The use of armored support to harvest the Q's personal heroin crop:

Probably most damaging of all was a photo that Gyuss had taken of his recent trip to California:

The Q's Secret Army!!

Our worldwide network of allies has infiltrated the dark innerworkings of the Q/Gyuss sanctum santorum to find that they have unbeknownst the rest of the world been developing a sleeper army around the world. This secret army is composed of the Q's most fervent supporters in his quest for world destruction and inhabits the rural pasteur of many nations. That's right the Q/Gyuss team has called upon their natural allies the mindless sheep of the world to reign death and terror upon all freedom loving people. God help us all.
Open Letter to the Q and Gyuss

Q's Soldiers Woefully Outmatched
Say "We Kind of Rushed Into This"

Recent events have shown that the Q and his lover/ally Gyuss have bitten off more than they can chew as reports come in one after the other of their troops defeats. One captured enemy commander from Q's Armored Cavalry reports that "We kind of rushed into this. I mean we didn't have any training or anything!!! We would probably be a lot more effective if we at least had the manuals to these things. Instead we bought them second hand". Asked about his outlook for the coming days he said, "We're screwed. Thanks for nothing Q!"

Photos from the front lines seem to confirm what this one enemy officer said and confirm earlier reports that the axis of evil was having trouble recruiting competent soldiers.

Allied Forces Bring Down Another Disturbing Q Monument

The Q/Gyuss insurgent movement is losing ground at an imoressive rate. Around the globe their compounds and hidden cells of radical loyalists are being defeated. And with each victory by our good service men and women we find more monuments that Q has erected to suit his own vile compulsions. We have worked tirelessly and will continue to do so to end the madness and terror that is our enemy.