Friday, June 29, 2007

The Unerring and Most Accurate Recollections of the Blogworthy Weekend Shared by the Crotch Wizards

Part 3

The third day was met in a groggy fashion as Cyber D and Q arrived at the House of Dagromm in the early hours of the morning. Gyuss, Pokiman, and I had already awoken. I severely burned from long shirtless hours in the sun. Pokiman and Gyuss severely burning from unprotected sex in a less than hygienic fashion.

Still we were excited to meet the days challenges head on. We all had visions of the everlasting glory that we would have for the next year if we could triumph in any of the days' events. Q had early success as the first competition was his strongest, Twister. In anything Q considers a contact sport he likes to bring the pain and with Gyuss, Poki, and myself being in weakened states we were little competition. Cyber D was much to fragile for Q's onslaught and this one was over before it ever truly began.
The next tournament was a closely contested battle for supremacy between Gyuss and myself. The Slip and Slide was pushed to its limits as we each tried to outduel each other. There has been some controversy as to what the final results of this contest were. Although I dominated the early goings on Gyuss was able to squeek out some success towards the end. In the end, nobody wanted to tell Gyuss he had ultimately lost.

We moved on to a game of survival, which may sound dangerous but when you hang with the Wizards you learn to thrive on danger. I won't go into details about the competition but I will say that it included shotguns, fire axes, explosives. I don't really remember who won this challenge. It wasn't me so I tried to forget about it.

We moved on to a challenge where we switched from the hunted to the hunter and no cheerleader was safe. For this we split into pairs and since there was an odd number of attendees I paired up with my son. I can't account for anyone else, but my son did well for his young age. He had tons of enthusiasm and was pleased that he was getting to join in on some manly fun. I think that Cyber D and Pokiman also did well. Gyuss and Q? Not so much.

Lastly, was the battle of knowledge. Sadly this was a lot less competitive than I would have expected. It came down to Q and myself. I was able to secure 1st runner up and Q won on a poor judges decision. They approved an incorrect answer as being "close enough". I'm not bitter or anything, but that shit isn't happening again! Whatever, I should've known Q would be fixed. What a bunch of a-holes!!!!

My family was great to put up with us the entire 14 hours that day. My son participated at points which was cool even if he was a little over enthusiastic at times. My daughter was cool and didn't raise a fit at being ignored all day. I think I've set her up for some really healthy relationships in the future.