Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Many Projects

In my quest to keep it real and stay hard core, I've decided that I need to obtain my own pimp cup. You know like the chalice that Snoop Dog carries all the time. Or the one that Lil' Jon has when he's out. Hell even 50 cent has a pimp cup to drink his vitamin water out of. So I decided that the time had come for me to join my brothers in pimpdom and obtain one of my own. I was so excited as I left the house and headed for the mall. I could only imagine how everybody at work was going to be jealous the next day. Them drinking from styrofoam cups, me from goblet of krunkness. Well I practically ran into Things Remembered and searched for a kick ass, possibly iced out, drinking vessel. What I found though were coffee mugs that said "#1 Boss" and "#1 Dad" and "#1 Employee". Some of them had brass name plates, but none of them looked very gangsta. I asked the employee whether they had any good pimp cups for my Krunk Juice and he just stared at me as if I was speaking another language. Just another example of the man trying to keep me down.

No problem though, I'm going to Hobby Lobby after work to get supplies to make my own pimp cup. It's gonna be off the chain!

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Just Getting Around To This

I found this article on Yahoo some weeks back and had meaning to post about it since then.

LONDON, Jan 8 (Reuters Life!) - For sale: the world's smallest country with its own flag, stamps, currency and passports.
Apply to Prince Michael of Sealand if you want to run your own nation, even if it is just a wartime fort perched on two concrete towers in the North Sea.
Built in World War Two as an anti-aircraft base to repel German bombers, the derelict platform was taken over 40 years ago by retired army major Paddy Roy Bates who went to live there with his family.
He declared the platform, perched seven miles off the east coast of England and just outside Britain's territorial waters, to be the principality of Sealand.
The self-styled Prince Roy adopted a flag, chose a national anthem and minted silver and gold coins.
The family saw off an attempt by Britain's Royal Navy to evict them and also an attempt in 1978 by a group of German and Dutch businessmen to seize Sealand by force.
Roy, 85, now lives in Spain and his son Michael told BBC Radio on Monday his family had been approached by estate agents with clients "who wanted a bit more than a bit of real estate, they wanted autonomy."
He suggested Sealand, which has eight rooms in each tower, could be a base for online gambling or offshore banking.
Asked to describe the delights of living on what he described as a cross between a house and a ship, the 54-year-old said: "The neighbors are very quiet. There is a good sea view."

I don't really have anything to add to this article other than Prince Roy was a bad ass. I could see myself doing this same thing. I would of course name the nation Dagrommia and our national anthem would be Feelin' On Yo Booty by R. Kelly. Everyone would be wealthy and every citizen would have a swimsuit calendar. The proceeds of which would go to fund the government. The highest seller would be my second in command. I think it would be recognized as the greatest nation on Earth.

Monday, January 29, 2007

My Reason For Getting Up in the Morning

Every morning one of the first things I do as I stumble bleary eyed out of bed is to wander down the hallway to my living room and turn the TV on to CNN Headline News. The reason? My crush on Robin Meade. There have been many mornings that I've thought about sleeping longer or calling in, but I know that if I did then I would miss this princess of current events. Instead, I eagerly find the remote and punch in to learn about Korean nuclear testing and Kentucky train wrecks. Hezbollah rockets have never been sexier.
I am:
Robert A. Heinlein
Beginning with technological action stories and progressing to epics with religious overtones, this take-no-prisoners writer racked up some huge sales numbers.

Which science fiction writer are you?

Friday, January 26, 2007

New Game
I had the idea to try this out the other day, so I'll give it a shot. I will give you the description of someone famous (at least somewhat) with chronological clues and you guess who it is. This is open to anyone that would like to give this a try. I might even have a prize for the winner.

Who Am I?

I have been many things in my lifetime. At one point I felt as small as a bug. At others I was known to jump around like a monkey. In 1971 I was obsessed with my father's team while it struggled with race relations. Still I got older and black and white took on new meanings as I found passion in racing. I've even had a stint as a competitive skater. Now my life seems to have a new chapter every week. Some want me dead, but nobody's been able to kill me.

So that's it. Make your guesses in the comments section. I'll let everyone know when someone gets it right. I don't know if this is too hard or too easy, but I certainly hope that somebody out there cares to take a guess.
Recommended Reading

The local Walden Books was closing down and had everything that was left at a 40% discount. I looked around (not for anything in particular) and found this book. I was actually already aware of this book and the film that was adapted from it, but had not ever read it or seen the movie. I'm not sure exactly where I knew of this from as the book and movie were both manufactured and distributed in Japan, but regardless for 40% off I felt like I needed to give it a try. Well 10% of the way into a 600+ page book I'm really glad that I did. It has been a long while since I've had a book that I was excited to get back to everyday and eagerly wanted to read. It's a fictional story about an Asian Governmental Program that takes 50 random high school classes each year and puts them in a remote place and forces them to kill each other until only one person is left. That last person is the "winner" and gets a lifetime pension and a card autographed by the dictator. This book is violent and not for kids, but it's loads of fun. So be sure to check out Battle Royale by Koushun Takami.

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

This is pretty much the same image my coworkers see as I walk out the door everyday.

I think Tupac and I share a lot of similarities actually. With the exception of the dew rag, tattoos, expensive jewelry, and bullet wounds we could almost be twins. I'm pretty sure that Pac was a Democrat. He loved his mama like a good boy. He kept it real and was a member of the Digital Underground. In fact I think if you held my resume and his up side by side they would probably look like carbon copies of each other. I'm pretty sure that I remember reading somewhere that if he hadn't gotten into gangsta rapping and the Thug line of work that he probably would have gotten into HR. That's about the same thing that happened to me. It just turned out my liberal arts degree is more valuable in the field of Human Resources than in the realm of Hip Hop. These are the things they don't warn you to ask at college preview weekends.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007


My daughter is sitting 12 feet away from me playing her drumset to the tune of Queen's Greatest Hits. She's been doing this now for 30 minutes. I think I'm developing an aneurism develop now. I swear my eyeballs are bleeding and every muscle in my neck and shoulders is in knots. After every song she turns to me and asks how that sounded. "It sounds really good, honey. You're getting better" Now, I know why people lose their hearing as they get older. It's a defense mechanism.
Another Change

Do you guys like this template any better? Q was complaining about the last one.

Monday, January 22, 2007

Slightly Disturbing

I only said slightly to make Gyuss feel better, but when I did a yahoo search trying to find his blog some curious information came up. Check it out:

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1 - 4 of about 5 for cave devil hermit Gyuss - 0.92 sec. (About this page)
2006 Weblog Awards - Blog Of The Day Awards - Top Blog Awards: July 2006 - Best Blog - Top Blogs - Best Blog Awards...
... Blog of the Day Award goes to Gyuss Baaltar for his wierd guy on the ... thusly: Cave of Gyuss Baaltar: hermit, luddite, man's man, handsome devil, gnome - 96k - Cached - More from this site
drilldo globalspec pump sex fucking machine machines forums board forum
drilldo sex machine forums machines board globalspec fucking forum ... Cave of Gyuss Baaltar: hermit, luddite, man's man, handsome devil. - 26k - Cached - More from this site
Cave of Gyuss Baaltar: hermit, luddite, man's man, handsome devil, gnome without a cause.: Pick 'Em Part 1
Since I apparently cannot pick football games, I'm going with a new strategy ... Gyuss Baaltar. Too handsome to be a pirate, too talkative to be a ninja. - More from this site
YouTube. Accountants. Acne Treatments. Adware Remover. Adware Spyware ... Air Humidifiers. Alarm System. Alarm Systems. Alaskan Cruises. Alpharetta Real Estate - More from this site
In order to show you the most relevant results, we have omitted some entries very similar to the ones already displayed.If you like, you can repeat the search with the omitted results included.

It's interesting that his site was number three after the Weblog Awards and Drilldo. You might want to be a little more discrete Gyuss?
I Took the Kids on the Way Back Machine

Every once in a while I get the urge to watch an old movie that I remember from my younger days and expose the kids to some retro culture. This weekend I rented Adventures in Babysitting. To make it even more retro I got it on VHS so that we could enjoy the poor picture quality that the original artists had intended. Anyway, the kids liked it a bunch and I was surprised how much the movie held up. I was afraid that the kids would be turned off early on because it would look dated, but they got caught up in it and couldn't be torn away. I guess some things just transcend time. Like Elizabeth Shue. She really rocked that 80's hair. Maybe more than any other person, and that's a feat. We miss you Elizabeth Shue!!! Come back from the future!!!!
A Shout Out To My Younger Readers Out There

As a parent of a young daughter I find that I become more and more concerned with what images are being portrayed to girls as to what an ideal girl is. I know this isn't groundbreaking stuff, but I guess as a male it was easy to turn a blind eye to until now. I worry that she feels that being blonde is prettier than having dark hair, that having straight hair is prettier than curly, and that having white skin is prettier than having brown skin. These are all things that she has intimated that the would prefer to have. As a father it worries me to no end. I think she is a beautiful girl and I worry that she won't value herself as much as she should. I look at things like Barbies and the celebutantes that are all the rage now and worry about how much they negatively impact her self image. Mattell has done a lot to include multicultural friends and give them their own character and style, but in the end Barbie is still the lead. If you asked my daughter which was her favorite of her dolls she will answer Barbie, even though there are others that look more like her. Those are her second favorite.

On top of that I worry about the glorification of the party girl right now. The celebutantes once again are partly to blame for this, as well as the music industry with songs and videos imploring girls to act like strippers, and various other commercials, shows, and movies. I know that the easy answer for people to say is to monitor what she watches, change the channel, etc., but that's not always an effective solution. Lots of times what was once safe isn't anymore. Mary Kate and Ashley, Lindsay Lohan, and others were once all seen as very safe child stars. They were marketed to kids until every kid knew who they were. They then succumbed to the lifestyle and pressure of big media until they become the last people you want your child to emulate. The message I'm afraid all of this is sending to young girls is, "you need to look pretty, shake your ass, and be ready to take your clothes off at the drop of a hat because that's all you're good for".

I guess I could go on and on about this, but I won't. In closing I just want to say to all of the House of Dagromm's younger readers out there is that you don't have to look like this to be a beautiful and wonderful person.

...but if you do, don't be afraid to shoot me a line.

Friday, January 19, 2007

The True and Factudinal History of the Bloggy Four

There have been some recent blog posts giving renditions of how myself, Gyuss, Cyber D, and Q became the pre-eminent force of nature that we've become. This is my attempt to clear any misinformation that may be floating around out there and give the world it's definitive answer.

It all began on a warm autumn day some fifteen years ago. I was an athletic, ambitious, smart freshman student in a small private college in north Texas. I would appear to have it all to most people, and I did, but I knew that my having it all wasn't enough. I knew that I needed to give back to the community. It was at this point that I decided to take an ignorant and unworldly west Texas freshman named Gyuss Baltaar under my wing. My interaction with Gyuss at that point had mainly been through my roommate at the time who was working with him as part of some religious mission. Gyuss was having trouble relating to the non-west Texas world around him. He wasn't well liked and in fact was struggling in many areas. Finally, Gyuss couldn't take it anymore and felt that he might need to end it all. I remember looking into that tear stained face of his and saying, "Don't you worry little bird. I'm going to help you. We're going to pull your head out of the sand and by God I swear one day you'll fly!" I saw the potential in young Gyuss. I knew that he could blossom if he was just given the right direction and had someone to believe in him. Thanks to community showers in the dorms I also knew that he was hung like no other man or beast. I mean, take your breath away, it gave me nightmares.
It seemed that much of Gyuss' stress revolved around his roommate CyberD. Now I had met CyberD a few times and we really hadn't spoken a lot, but I knew for my plan to work and for Gyuss to live I had to have him on my side. So I took it upon myself to seek out CyberD and ensnare him in a project that seemingly had no relation what so ever with Gyuss. I knew from my conversations with Gyuss that CyberD was a fan of a game that I happened to be an expert at. So CyberD and I made an appointment to meet in the school library one evening and discuss our mutual interest. By the end of the meeting, CyberD was so impressed with my skill and knowledge that he begged me to enter into a project with him and teach him. My plan was working. I told CyberD that I would allow him to work with me and be my apprentice, but that we would have to assemble a team and that Gyuss should be included. He reluctantly agreed and we embarked in a two year endeavor that would forever altar the lives of our team. During this time I came to learn a lot about CyberD and although we often were frustrated with each other, we always realized that in the end he needed me, almost as much as Gyuss. On top of that CyberD was a maestro with the ladies and Lord knows I love the ladies.

Years passed, we all graduated though CyberD tried to get us kicked out on an Environmental Economics project we worked on together. CyberD moved off to the other side of the world and Gyuss and I stayed behind to look after our little town. Gyuss became a regular at my house and in his time of need when he had to go to the hospital, I was there for him (CyberD was no where to be seen). Eventually my musky scent was too much for CyberD to live without and he moved back to our college town. At the same time Gyuss was about ready to spread his wings and finally leave the nest. It was with a heavy heart that I told Gyuss that "he was all growns up" and let him go.

Over the next couple of years I met a young whelp named Q. At first we met I was impressed with how savvy he was for such a young age and I told him that he would probably get a lot out of hanging out with my crew. He tried to set some things up a few times, but I don't allow anyone in too easily and I told Q to "go home and come back tomorrow". Eventually the Q had no recourse but to stalk me at my work and I realized that he was ready to be imparted with the lessons life had taught me. Q was an eager student and returned daily to learn more. He referred to me as "the professor" and I tried not to refer to him. I finally convinced CyberD that this apprentice of mine was ready to join our ranks as an equal (to CyberD). CyberD agreed and we began to work as a new team. Q came to depend on us and in his time of need when he had to go to the hospital, I was there for him (CyberD was no where to be seen).

Then in the last year CyberD told me that he had begun a blog and that I should check it out. I did and was so impressed that he could function without me that I quickly established my own blog and Q did the same. CyberD passed word on to Gyuss some time later and we were reconnected in the eyes of God and the general blog community.

After that it was merely a matter of time before we ruled with our army of nano-ninjas.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Trying to Keep it Sportsy

In an attempt to keep everyone up to date with the ever changing world of college athletics I have done an in depth research project on the recruiting classes of big time college football programs. You (the blogging world) might be stunned to find out that Florida International has apparently had some struggling recruiting and currently boasts the 113th best recruiting class. This could be fall-out from the trick play that they ran in their game with Miami this year (pictured). This places them two spots behind the University of North Texas which has no doubt been bolstered by the signing of Todd Dodge as their head coach. This just goes to show that the sports landscape can change on a dime in college athletics. For those who are interested the University of Texas is currently ranked number one. This has become somewhat of a tradition for the Longhorns. They will be rated number one untill signing day at which point they will have people pull their commitments and go to play elsewhere.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

I Want To Apologize to My Loyal Readership

I'm trying to get back on the blog horse as I know that I've let a number of you down by not posting in several days. I will not make excuses, but I will explain what has been going on in that time that has kept me away. Unbeknownst to most I have been on a blog sabbatical to work tirelessly towards self improvement. Over the course of the last several days I have commenced an intense workout regimen to improve my physique and overall health. This includes a strict diet of boiled salmon, kale, and Megaman vitamins from GNC. I normally mix them together in a blender and drink them like a smoothy five times a day in place of traditional meals. Sometimes I just lay them on a plate seperately though if I feel the need to dine with family. My workout includes crunches while hanging upside down from my shower curtain rod and doing lunge thrusts around the neighborhood that I live in. This hasn't been just about getting in shape though. I have also used the last few days to improve my mind. To this end I have read the entire World Book encyclopedia collection that was at my local library. I now have a comprehensive fourth grade level knowledge of all things through 1997. In addition to this I worked to improve my soul. In my quest for enlightenment, I have spent every night for the last ten days meditating upon the universe in the winter air from the roof over my house. I blocked out all sensory distractions to dwell upon the meaning of being. The first eight days were fruitless, but on the ninth I ascended to a higher plane of existence. I also watched Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby. I give it an A-. I thought unrated meant there would be nudity.
So I apologize loyal readers. I have not forsaken you in my quest for improvement. I have not been sitting idly by while my blog has gone unattended. No, this time was important to help me become the person that I knew I could truly be.