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Today the House of Dagromm has accepted the official surrender of Gyuss Baltaar. Here is pictured the last of Gyuss' cabinet about to surrender their weapons. With all of the House of Dagromm centered on one enemy a quick resolution is anticipated.
It's a house. My house. I'm Dagromm. Sort of. It can also mean more than that. A lot more. It's mysterious that way.
Field scouts are getting closer to finding the current hiding spot of the Q/Gyuss tandem of evil. Ever since their respective headquarters were overrun last week they have been on the lamb, moving from one safe house to another. Normally this might make it difficult to find an adversary, but in this case our team of experts have identified evidence that makes their trail quite distinctive. We are not going to disclose what this evidence is as we don't want to tip our hand to the enemy, but the attached photo is some sort of clue for the curious.
The use of armored support to harvest the Q's personal heroin crop:
Allied Forces Bring Down Another Disturbing Q Monument
The Q/Gyuss insurgent movement is losing ground at an imoressive rate. Around the globe their compounds and hidden cells of radical loyalists are being defeated. And with each victory by our good service men and women we find more monuments that Q has erected to suit his own vile compulsions. We have worked tirelessly and will continue to do so to end the madness and terror that is our enemy.
The Q's Corner Has Been Found!!!!
It can now be confirmed that the base of operation for the self appointed master of evil and degradation known as the Q has been located. These photos taken by our spy network shows what poor shape the Q is actually in. Actions are already underway to close down the Corner and locate the Cave of Guy Ass Ball Tar.
The Fountain
There's a lot of different things going on in this movie which makes it hard to explain in a blog format so instead I will transcribe my thoughts at different junctures during the movie.
5 minutes-What the F?
10 minutes-huh?
15 minutes-Crap, I could've been watching Tenacious D and the Pick of Destiny, or Stranger Than Fiction, or Happy Feet, or The Prestige, or Saw III, or ....
25 minutes-...or Borat, or Flushed Away, or The Guardian, or Santa Clause III: The Escape Clause, or Deck the Halls, or....
40 minutes-I wish Wolverine would hurry up and kill some people.
50 minutes-I'm not getting any if I leave this thing. I gotta be good through this to earn the panty points.
55 minutes-All out of popcorn?!?? Damn, I should have gotten a hotdog, or nachos, or a Nestle Crunch, or Twizzlers, or M&M's, or Gummi Bears, or ....
1 hour-...or Junior Mints, or Raisinets, or malt balls, or chocolate covered almonds, or a pickle, a movie meal wouldn't have been bad, or a Hot Tamales, or Goobers, or Sour Patch Kids, or...
1 hour 5 minutes-I wonder if there are any good looking girls in this theater.
1 hour 10 minutes-Nope.
1 hour 20 minutes-That's a lot of snow. Maybe Sabertooth is going to show up. Or Lady Deathstrike, or Pyro, or Magneto...
1 hour 25 minutes-...or Mystique, or Juggernaut, or Callisto, or Phoenix, or Toad, or ...
1 hour 30 minutes-Oh God!! Was I snoring??? Gotta hold it together. I've almost made it. Maybe I can do some jumping jacks in the back of the theater without anyone noticing. Panty points. Panty points.
1 hour 35 minutes-Damn, it's quiet leaving this theater. I hope she doesn't ask me what I thought of the movie.
The special effects were ok, but it needed more action scenes. I give it an A-.
Just an update to let you know how The House of Dagromm celebrated Halloween this year. First, my wife and I sent our kids out with some neighborhood friends to go Trick or Treating. It was a year for combo costumes as the boy decided to be an "off the shelf" Cyborg/Alien and the girl got her wish to be a Vampire Rock Star. I blame these costume choices on things like Yu-Gi-Oh which has monsters with confusing over explained names like The Blue Eyes White Dragon. My wife and I stayed behind to pass out treats and put up some hastily thrown together decorations. I set out the electric jack-o-lantern (thanks mom), put the glow in the dark skull in the window, and put about 1/5 of the fake cobwebs that we bought up around the door with some plastic spiders. I also put out the electronic talking tombstone that we bought. Unfortunately that purchase wasn't that well thought out, as it's motion activated and almost the entire area around our front door is paved driveway. If I put it in the yard then nobody would ever activate it and if I put it in the driveway then it becomes unfortunately so unconvincing as to be stupid. So instead I stuffed it into the holly bushes so that it wasn't seen much, but was at least activated once in a while. Then my wife and I waited for trick or treaters. She wore our sons grim reaper mask and shroud from last year and I controlled the lights. When people came to our door, I would flick off the porch lights and we live on a very dark street and turn on s strobe light that was inside the house. Then I would slowly open the door and my wife would walk down the front hall towards them as a flickering vision of death. It was pretty fun to see the reaction although it took a few times to get it right. She didn't have her contacts in the first time and I don't think it was too scary as death walked into door frames and stumbled around trying to find the candy that was obviously set right behind her. We got a couple of oohs and aahs as well as a few shrieks, but everybody appeared to appreciate the effort.
After our kids finally made it back home we ate a late dinner and watched Monster House on DVD. It's a cute movie that's appropriately dark and has what I think is the right level of scariness for kids 7 and up. Unfortunately my daughter is 6 and needed to sleep with her big brother last night. Oh well, everybody is groggy today and we all agreed to get to bed early tonight. We'll see if that sticks.
My Favoritest Football Player
I had a converstaion with Q last night and we agreed that Chad Johnson is probably the football player that we would be most likely to enjoy hanging out with. In fact he reminds me of Q quite a lot. From his sense of humor to his willingness to embrace new bad haircuts. In fact he reminds me of Q so much that I know that I wouldn't ever accept an invite to his house without a concealed unregistered handgun locked and loaded. Viva La Ocho Cinco!!!